To My White Mom Friends: Here’s How To Be An Ally.

Summer is approaching, and while this one will certainly be a little different for us all, I will go into it as I have for the last thirteen years: with fear. Being a black mom with a teenage son, every summer feels a little scary for me, and this one is also complicated by the pandemic. And now, with the recent murder of George Floyd by four police officers in Minneapolis, the current riots across our country, killing of protesters, and the pandemic, my fears are at an all time high. I am worried about my kids and yours. What […]

The Yoke That Burdens.

There was more than just a knee on the back of George Floyd’s neck. There is the obvious human, physical weight of Derek Chauvin – muscle, bone, tendon, tissue But Pressing in from above is also the weight of his bias and whatever history in his past that led him to hold so small a view of a human life. I lift my eyes higher, and I see all of the black and brown people who have been killed because of the color of their skin…from Emmett Till to Allen Brooks to Ahmaud Arbery. The pressing in continues as I […]

He Outweighs It All

There’s a big old world out there full of endless possibilities, and then, there’s him.  There are childhood fairytales that may come to life if you believe hard enough, magical kingdoms to visit, dreams that run far and wide, and then, there’s him. There’s every wish you have ever had come true with the snap of your fingers or the blowout of sparkling candles on the most decadent birthday cake, and then, there’s him.  There’s the possibility of a globe that spins seamlessly with no hate, no fear, no pain, and no loss, and then, there’s him. There’s everything I […]

Don’t Blink

Time. It waits for no one. It refuses to stand still and marches forward with perfect pace.  Regardless of whether we want it to speed up, beg it to slow down, or wish we could hold on to the parts that have already past, it remains still unchanged. It is fleeting, yet always continuing onward.  Time itself is invisible, but the moments within it are so very evident. The smiles we give, the embrace’s we feel, the milestones we celebrate, the lessons we learn, and the love we teach. We live in those moments…that is, until we don’t.  With each […]

We Are Here

Editor’s note: I wrote this post after talking with my son about his anxiety during this complicated time. Now You Know Do you try and go to bed, but your brain is making small fast circles and you stare at the ceiling while your heart beats wildly? You chase sleep like the wind, but you cannot catch it. Do you know the feeling when the world is shifting between your two feet, like slippery sinking no-air quicksand? Everything that kept you rooted to your life is changing. No schedule. No routine. Nothing is the same. Your body is empty and […]

4 Lessons I’ve Learned From Quarantined Life

I am kind of over the whole Coronavirus/Quarantine thing. I mean I was never really under it, to be honest- who among us was? But yes, I laughed out loud at the I-can’t-stop-eating-and-touching-my-face memes, I fully embraced waking up sans alarm, working from home in pajamas and I most definitely celebrated NOT having to pack school lunches and act as the freaking carpool queen. For the first few weeks, it wasn’t so bad. I was living my best life and successfully staying in the moment. Now? Not so much. The jokes are getting stale (sorry, not sorry) and I spend […]

How to Create Loyalty in Your Relationship

The definition of loyal is faithful allegiance. So, what does that mean in relationship? Knowing you have loyalty in a relationship is knowing that your partner always has your back, and that you can count on them through thick and thin. This provides stability and a strong foundation that’s imperative for any relationship to go the distance. A great example in how this shows up in a relationship is when after a hectic day at work, your partner provides a sounding board to vent your feelings and emotions from the roller coaster you experienced. This not only enhances interpersonal communication, […]

Learn to Love Again After Trust Issues Arise

Chances are good that at some point in your life, you will experience betrayal by someone you love. In most instances, this is not intentional because as humans, we make mistakes. How you and your partner handle the situation is key to your relationship’s survival. The Importance of Trust in a Relationship Trust is the act of placing confidence in someone or something else. Trust is necessary for a relationship to thrive. Without it, fear rules. For a loving relationship to flourish, several aspects need to function optimally. One of the most important aspects is trust. When there are trust […]

We Finally Have Time To Stop And Smell The Dandelions.

The best way I can think of to describe this situation: We finally have time to stop and smell the dandelions. Have you ever smelled a dandelion? Technically dandelions are weeds, so they don’t often show up in corsages nor have they ever made it into any bouquet that has graced my table. When I pass dandelions in my lawn, my reaction typically is to not notice them at all, or think we really need to break out some weed spray. But the past couple of days, my kids have been entranced by these little yellow weeds. They have filled my […]

To the Mom on the Zoom Call

Dear Mom on the Zoom Call, I see you. And not just in the “I see you because I am you” kind of way. I see you in the very real see you right there on my screen kind of way. I see the oversized luggage under your eyes because you were up late last night trying to fit in the work that didn’t happen between 9am and 5pm. I see the toddler wriggling on your lap that everyone is oohing and ahhing over while you are attempting to maintain some semblance of professionalism and contribute to the conversation. I […]

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