There’s love, and then there’s epic love. We think it’s safe to say that most of us want the latter!
But is that type of romance saved for once-in-a-lifetime relationships, or is it something that any of us can work toward? Well, as great as it would be for “epic love” to always be instant and lasting with that special someone, that’s rarely how it plays out. Like anything, it takes effort — but it is always, always worth it!
Still, we believe there are certain core principles that can help you expedite the journey to epic love, and we’ve put together a list of our favorites. Here are 10 lessons for developing a deep, lasting relationship.
1. Love is always an option.
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Love is not always going to feel like a honeymoon. In fact, there are moments when it doesn’t feel much like love at all. Why? Because love isn’t a feeling. It’s a promise and a choice that can — and must — be made every single day, even when it feels impossible.
2. It’s OK to give more love than you receive.
Sometimes there will be seasons, even really long seasons, when you’re the one who is loving the most. Don’t let this lead you to a love shutdown. Even when it feels risky, choosing to be true to your feelings is worth it. In a healthy relationship, it won’t be long before your partner is returning the favor!
3. Never skip a chance for a compliment.
Studies have shown a proven ratio for making love last. It comes down to five positive interactions for every one negative interaction. Even the simplest compliments and expressions of gratitude shown regularly can fuel a relationship for countless years to come!
4. Fight fair.
For most relationships, it’s not about what you fight about, but rather how you fight about it. Work through your issues with such care and respect that you grow closer in the process.
5. Be vulnerable.
As scary as it can be, there is nothing better than to be fully seen and fully loved. Of course, to be loved exactly as you are, you have to be willing to be vulnerable and be exactly who you are.
Be open and honest, and communicate when you’re hurting. Equally important, be a safe space for them to do the same.
6. Don’t isolate.
The beauty of a loving relationship is getting to go through life’s difficulties as a team. Don’t isolate yourself when things are tough. Be in each other’s corner and fight through it together.
7. Value your partner with your time.
The quickest way to find what someone values is to look at how they spend their minutes. Are you spending time with the person you love? It’s not in grand trips and extravagant dates, but rather in the small, spontaneous, everyday moments where true romance is grown.
8. Celebrate your differences.
Love isn’t about finding a mirror image of yourself. Celebrate what makes you and your partner different and the many ways you balance each other out. Don’t try to make them fit your expectations. Instead, consider ways that you can also grow to be a better partner for them.
9. Surround yourself with other great loves.
Set your relationship up for success by surrounding yourself with other relationships that you deeply respect and look up to. And engage in activities you adore. Your partner can’t meet all your needs, but you certainly can!
10. Keep the romance growing.
Always have something to look forward to together, be it a cooking class, a road trip, or a snazzy date night! Keep life together exciting by always having something positive on the horizon.
Don’t forget: Love is truly one of the best gifts life has to offer. It’s an opportunity to share your days with another and grow together through thick and thin. It won’t always be easy, but when you’ve reached the point of “epic love,” you can easily say: It is all worth it!
Try out some of these tips in your own relationship, and share them with a friend.
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