‘I’m not ‘babying’ my kid. He doesn’t need to ‘toughen up’ or ‘be a man.’ He needs to be LOVED.’: Mom responds to parenting criticism, ‘my child is not a man’

sleeping little boy next to mom smiling at camera

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“Listen up.

I am a wife and an amazing mother to a 3-year-old boy. I’m also currently pregnant with a little girl who will be born in February.

I adore motherhood and, being a part of this community, I like to share my daily experience with other moms and dads. There is always so much to learn, grow, and be open to. That being said, there are many barriers that we parents face. We often get unasked advice about our kids.

So, let me speak my mind for a second…

I am so tired of hearing that I am ‘spoiling’ or ‘babying’ my kid.

I get annoyed when people see me hug CJ and say, ‘You are spoiling him. He’s got to toughen up and be a man.’

BREAKING NEWS!

I AM A WOMAN.

I am his MOTHER.

This story originally appeared on Love What Matters.

Courtesy of Ashley Swain

No matter what I do, I could never raise him to be a ‘man.’

I know nothing about being one.

That’s why he has a FATHER, GRANDFATHER, UNCLES, MALE COUSINS, and MALE mentors to step in.

1) He is 4-year-old boy. Not a man. Read that again.

2) Every chance I get I will hug and feed him with words of affirmations so he will always feel and know he is loved.

3) I’m not raising my kid on the same trauma y’all thrived on just to appear like it was for the best and made y’all ‘stronger.’ Meanwhile, I’ve noticed you’re unforgiving, mean, hostile and in need of THERAPY.

You NEEDED a hug.

You needed to be held safely.

You needed to be loved.

4) Y’all momma didn’t hug y’all, and it shows.

I will continue to ‘spoil’ or ‘baby’ my kid if it means they know they are LOVED.”

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This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Ashley Swain of Atlanta, Georgia. You can follow her journey on Instagram and her podcast here.

Courtesy of Ashley Swain

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