Dad With 4 Daughters Gets Hilariously Honest On Instagram, Shares Photos Of Life With All Girls!

This isn’t the first time we’ve told you about some seriously honest parents. We shared this list of hilarious parenting tweets to make you laugh, and there was this dad who wrote “10 Things No One Ever Told Me About Having A Daughter.” But Father Simon Hooper from London isn’t only totally transparent, he’s totally hilarious!

Simon is Dad to 4 daughters, all under 10 years old; there’s a 9-year-old, a 6-year-old, and 10-month-old twins. He and his wife both Instagram their parenting journey with candid, clever captions.

“In general my whole account is to show a realistic view of what parenting is like from a parent’s perspective,”the dad told Huffington Post. “There is way too much sugarcoating when it comes to parents, so I wanted to share what it’s really like and provide a bit of humor at the same time.â€

Check out our favorite 15 from Simon’s Instagram below, and be sure to check out the brilliant captions!

1. Mobile human climbing frame


2. Human floor cleaners

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

“At least they do a good job of cleaning the floors, I should put Polish down and strap a rag to their stomachs. Might as well get them to pull their weight from an early age.”

3. He calls it the “dream feed,” because everyone else is asleep but he’s feeding the twins!

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on


4. Daddy’s little assistant…

Being able to work from home a few days a week is great, but I still have to work. I think sometimes Clemmie thinks it means I’ve taken a day off and can help out with the twins (obviously I can a bit, but not as much as she might want). To make things worse, my temp assistant today was terrible. Her excel skills were awful, I didnt receive any of my messages, my lunch order was wrong (no, I do not want an old apple core from the bin) and she walked around in her underwear. To top it all, I think she was drunk as she spent alot of time crawling around on the floor and babbling. Time to call HR. #putsomeclothesonslacker #babyassistantsarentagoodidea #exceltrainingneeded #norecommendationfromme #workingfromhome #WFH #fatherofdaughters #parenting #dadlife #instadad A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

5. The twins are teething!

Teething is now in full effect and the girls want us to know all about it. An email would have sufficed but it seems they’d rather use their voices to get the message across that they really aren’t enjoying this stage of development. Its not straight screaming, it’s more like the sound a wounded animal might make that just wants to end it all. I can’t blame them though, it’s like a mini scene from ‘Alien’ in there at the moment, just in very very slow motion (and of course teeth don’t then go on to kill you and the crew of your ship so a few subtle differences but essentially the same). #canyoubulkbuybonjela #teethinglikealien #twins #thisisntfunforanyone #doubleteethingisnotdoublethefun #fatherofdaughters #instadad #dadlife #daddydentist

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on


6. Somehow bath-time becomes an entire-family activity!

Why does bathtime always involve cramming as many family members into one of the smallest rooms in the house at the same time? I guess the eldest 2 like it as it’s like a cheap version of the sea life centre. They get to watch these weird pink slippery things splash about and generally contort themselves out of these chairs while sucking the life out of some sponges. Clemmie and I are there just play life guards and crowd control. I should charge admission. Just avoid the dirty nappies at the door and the water EVERYWHERE. Actually, forget it – Health and safety would definitely shut us down. #waterstaysinthebathgirls #bathtime #sealifecentreathome #cheapentertainment #twins #mygirls #theyneverstayinthesechairs #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

7. Help!

Someone call crime watch! I took this picture of a guy getting mugged in broad day light today. The 2 confidence tricksters are known in the local area and ply their trade by pretending to love their victims and then, when their guard is down, scratching their faces to pieces, pulling their hair and dribbling on them until they are given milk or rice cakes. The suspects are described as looking exactly the same, to the degree that their father cant tell them apart. They are around 2.5 ft tall, talk with a strange accent and are incredibly cute. Some previous victims had said they smell like a childrens play centre toilets but that has yet to be confirmed. #muggedbybabies #twins #parentinginjuries #thelmaandlouiseinthemaking #callcrimewatch #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on


8. Meeting with the board.

Today’s family strategy / calendar coordination meeting was going swimmingly. We’d nailed most of October (note that all of my social events had been vetoed by the other board members) but one of the interns kept chiming in with rude and unhelpful comments. I tried to lay down the law and express to her that she was being obstructive to the progress of the meeting. I recieved a raspberry in response followed quickly by a filled nappy – The meeting was adjourned. Guess I’ll just read the calendar to find out what I’m doing for the next couple of weeks as per usual. #ihavenocontrolovermylife #shellnevermakeitpasttheprobationperiod #familycalendar #stokkeadventures #familymeeting #interns #twins #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

9. “Outnumbered.”

Tomorrow is international day of the girl and I, more than most, am celebrating. I might be heavily outnumbered and outgunned, but I’m celebrating because my girls are strong independent young ladies that are growing up in a world that they can do anything they put their mind to (with a little encouragement). We strive for equality and see women as equals (and in my case, as superiors!). That said, in many places girls are seen as second class citizens and have limited opportunities to reach their full potential. This has to change. Go kiss your girls goodnight & encourage them everyday to reach for the stars. Tag a strong girl and share. #mygirlswearthetrousers #daughters #dayofthegirl #girlsareequals #girlsarestrong #sisters #mygirls #girlsareamazing #beproudofyoudaughters #fatherofdaughters #instadad #dadlife

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on


10. Conflict resolution = hide the remote!

why is it that as soon as I come through the front door, I’m immediately forced to strap on my ‘parenting UN’ flack jacket & hard hat and dive into conflict resolution mode? Anya and Marnie are locked in a long, drawn out battle over the disputed lands of the sofa, the sovereignty of the blanket and who has rightful ownership of the much sort after SKY remote control. Sanctions are put in place to relieve the tension but both sides are showing little willingness to back down. The situation escalates – heated worded, threats to hostages safety (soft toys, clothing, sweets). The result – the TV going off and remote is hidden (in the cutlery draw). During all this Ottie played the role of Switzerland and didn’t get involved. Ban Ki-moon could learn a thing or two from me. #wheredoyouhideyourremote #UNparenting #whyamialwaysinthemiddle #familyconflictresolution #adadsworkisneverdone #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

11. Putting “costume designer” on the Daddy-resume!

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

“Last night – ‘Oh daddy, remember to make our woodland themed costumes for school tomorrow!’ – Why is this the first I’m hearing about this at 8pm the day before you need them – I’m not some 24 hr costume design dept! Considered slapping a door mat on their backs and sending them off as hedgehogs”

12. Baby’s favorite game? Ripping out daddy’s chest hairs!

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

13. Stick to your edge, Dad!

Is it only me or do all men learn to sleep on an 8 inch strip at the edge of the bed? Irrespective of the size of the bed, or how many people are in it, I always find myself relegated to the ‘man zone’. I’ve become so used to sleeping on this limited area of bed real estate, that I’m confident that I could sleep on top of a wall & not fall off. On the other side of the bed (the promised land), @mother_of_daughters sleeps like a star fish all night long, kneeing me in the back and generally complains about me coming to bed too late, being too cold or my foot encroaching onto her territory. At least the bed’s nice and warm, even if the reception isn’t sometimes! I hope that next Sunday, on #NationalLieInDay, I’ll not only gain another hour in bed, but more space – but it’s doubtful ! If you want to regain that hour (and some space for that matter) click in the link in my bio, loads of great prizes to be won @SimbaSleep #bedrealestate #livingontheedge #girls #twins #daughters #therestoomanygirls #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #gopro

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on


14. “I basically live in this aisle of the supermarket now.”

Another monday, another last minute rush to the shops to avoid the armageddon I.e running out of nappies, wipes & baby crack (milk) for the addicts. I basically live in this aisle of the supermarket now. New parents seem to gravitate to me as an “experienced parent” (i.e. the tired looking guy shivering in the corner) and ask “do you know where so and so is please?” My reponse – “Sure 3rd shelf, half way down on the left hand side, buy 3 & get a discount,although you want to use that in combination with blah blah blah.” I’m like a walking encyclopaedia of baby product info. I used to use my brain to solve global corporate wide problems. I now use it to calculate bulk buy discounts. #ishouldgetanamebadge #bogofking #iliveherenojoke #dadbrain #lifeinthefastlane #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

15. But it’s all worth it in the end…

A photo posted by Simon (@father_of_daughters) on

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